It’s been a busy little while since I’ve written and I’m grateful for everything accomplished! Last night I tackled about 85% of a huge project that’s been on my mind constantly. The baby’s room!! I am SO happy to be making progress! All the furniture is rearranged, both recliners in there (mine and Bubby’s, and the closet/changing station is redone! Plus, extra “big toys” have been rerouted to the garage for summertime use. There is TONS of space! I even got Bubby’s tv in there finally!!! Last things to do are deep organizing like sorting clothes, painting, hanging the tv, clearing the top of the closet shelf, hanging a curtain, and going through the toy tubs again. This set up makes so much sense I don’t know why I didn’t think of it before? I mean… I’ve only rearranged in there about 10 times so far! This one is definitely gonna stick, until we move the other crib in there :). But, until that day comes, we plan on setting the new crib up in our master bedroom for a while. With all of our crazy clutter out of our bedroom, there is more space than I realized! It’ll be perfect ❤️.
So, since I’ve written last, I’ve tackled quite a bit! Painting, sorting, moving furniture, purging, reorganizing, driving my husband nuts etc. I plan on getting most (if not all) of my small doable projects done before Barnes baby #2 gets here. I want the last couple months of my pregnancy to be super easy, unlike how crazy I was with Brodderik. Lol! The “nesting”bug was BAD. Though… hubs and I were chatting last night… I think I started off “nesting” while he says nope. I’ve been “PROJECTING”, and “NOT resting”…and a little crazy. Okay, he didn’t call me crazy but I could see it in his gorgeous blue eyes. Definitely cracked me up! But I realize, I am in such a better place than I was last time. I am grateful for the energy and health I have presently. Yay! Eat your veggies!!
This week, I feel more and more at ease. I’m making good progress with my skin routine. I’m cooking new things. I’m relaxing more. And I’m less stressed, as more things get done. The Hubs and I are getting back on our feet after the financial tolls of Brody’s accident, finally! And our lives are about to change drastically in April!! Why? Because Ian is moving to a different shift at work and will home during the days!! Seriously, this will be HUGE! And I am SO excited for him!!
-Waiting for daddy to come home last night-
There will be big adjustments in sleeping schedules but I’m working on getting a head start on that this week with Brody. We are working on a good routine of waking up earlier, eating at more consistent meal times, better napping times, bathtimes, reading/quiet time, and earlier bedtime. Ian and I are getting more relax time (with Brody sleeping earlier), and I can feel Ian’s stress getting much easier for him. The best part of this new change will be that Ian will get to spend TONS more time being a dad! Especially with the new baby!
He won’t have to miss the milestones and will be there for those beautiful moments for both of our kids. I’ve wanted that SO badly for him, and very soon it’ll be a dream come true! He and I won’t know what to do with ourselves! Our entire relationship, he has worked SO much and so hard, and for a long time I did too. Now, we will get to go to the park together and play with Brody. He will have time to go for runs with the dog like he’s always wanted to. We will get to eat more sit down meals as a family and cook together as well. I have a feeling we are going to be unstoppable! Or drive each other crazy, ha ha! Maybe both at the same time? Either way, I welcome it all! I get to have my best friend home more than ever, and my heart is so thankful. And of course, I’ll get more fun husband time! Yay!
So, as I sit here now quietly on the couch sipping my tea, I feel at ease. My favorite music is softly playing through the house. Brody didn’t cry or fuss as much for today’s nap time and is sleeping soundly. I’m about to cook some lunch and try some new recipes. The laundry is my project today! And rest is my other. I feel like for the first time in many years, I can start to truly rest. My thoughts, my worries, my fears, my constant battle…. and I am grateful. Renewing of the mind. Mindfulness of the soul. And transformation of habits. My path looks more clear and my heart is lighter. Thank you to anyone for your prayers, thoughts, and love. Healing takes a while, but it’s coming.
-when did he get so darn big?-
On top of projects and all that madness, I’m finding time going by very quickly. Today marks 19 weeks and 1 day. My stomach is getting nice and round and I’m feeling more movement when I’m actually still. My craving for the past couple days has been cream puffs. Slightly still frozen cream puffs from Walmart. My wonderful husband went to get me some the other night… and they were out!! I literally cried over the phone when he told me. And today… that is still all I WANT!! I’m going a little crazy so I hope to get some soon. Sigh… besides that, I’m grateful that I have had really good energy! I haven’t needed naps as often (for now), and I have had a relatively good appetite. My daily treat is some of my favorite mint medley tea and some skin icing. I swear on the aroma therapy that comes with that! Because having a heightened sense of smell is usually NOT fun!
Wednesday is the big day for our new baby! Ian and I are still back and forth about a reveal thing. As we get closer, I’m thinking I just want simple. After all, that’s how I’m leading my life now! And, I’ve finally started to let myself dream about having a boy or girl. I haven’t wanted to get my hopes up for either one! But, the other day we walked through the baby clothes at the store and UGH the most adorable things popped up for girls. But, I’ve been dreaming about having a boy. I’ve been thinking about different names. Wondering and fantasizing about what they will look like or be like. I can’t wait to hold my new baby. Soft, warm, beautiful, and perfect. I often hear music that brings me back to those brand new days with Brody. I cry often. I let myself feel. I smile and laugh as much as possible. I try not to let my worry or sadness get to me like it used to. As the warmth of the sun starts to come back I feel myself gaining strength and power over my struggles.
All I know is, whatever we decide for Wednesday, I’m getting cake. Chocolate cake. Yes. And cream puffs!!!!!!! And then, the real planning begins!!! Oh goodness…